Thursday, 9 June 2016

Jon Snow, you stink

I am a fan of the Game of Thrones series. The thing is I am not a fan since the beginning. I start watching it when season 2 was over, so by the time season 3 started to get aired I was already up to date. My favorite characters when it comes to men are Khal Drogo (of course), Rob Stark and another of course, Jon Snow. Amazing men, good looking men,

Well, as you know, besides the story, violence, murder, plot, blood and guts all over the place, the series are famous also for the explicit pussys, dongs and sex scenes. Good. Perfect. No problem for me. I've seen porn. It lowered the standards for me.
And you see all these gorgeous men marching for days, weeks, fighting in battles in an era when showers and soap were not nvented and when people were not so water friendly. They come back to their women and they engage in fucking and all of a sudden your face turns like into an after tequila shot face when you realize that those people must smell very, very bad. The kind of smell that produces an automathic gagging reflex. I am not talking only about men here. Women also are to be blamed. The thing that comes into my mind is the smell that the watermelon leaves when left one week in the heat. Horrible!!!!!

I am very sensitive with any kind of smells, not to say the bad ones. Especially when it comes to sex and all the organs involved. I was very close once to a, let's say, not freshen up male reproductive organ. At that point I decided that that thing will not penetrate any of my female sanctuary holes. And it didn't. Yessss, I had the tequila after shot face. And what is worse, the smell stucked into my olfactive memory. So now, each time I am in a similar situation I have to carefully check it. You know, get closer a little bit, take a sniff, retrieve, then again even closer, take a sniff, retrieve again, and again even closer, until you hear him asking: "Are you going to blow me or you are preparing yourself for a high jump?" Relax dude, I am traumatized. :)

Do you remember that scene when Jon Snow loses his virginity with Yngritte? I think that's the definition of when somebody asks you to be dirty and filthy in bed.

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